Dying in the Darkness
by SilverPowder
Summary: I could never save them. I dont deserve to stay sane, not if I cant even save one life.
1. Dark Night

**This Fanfiction is written by Rogue Knight.**

 **Dark Night**

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 **Elesis P.O.V**

" _You fought well Red Knight, but I know you can do better._ " A voice of silk whispers to me through the dark. I walk arms outstretched trying to feel my way through the blackness, trying to find the speaker. I walk many steps but find nothing in the dim light of my unknown where abouts.

"Where am I?" I say to the darkness, my own voice sounds hollow and dead.

" _Your'e at the Gates of Death my dear_." the soft voice replies with a laugh that echoes through my empty head. That's when I notice the heaviness of my own body. I look down at my hands, and as I do the darkness around me lifts. My hands are dripping with scarlet blood, I look around me. My eyes are met by the most horrible sight. I feel a scream escape my lungs but I do not hear the sound. I'm surrounded by millions of dead bodies, the ground flows with blood, my nose is filled with the odor of rotting flesh. I fall to my knees covering my eyes. I don't want to see this. I've seen this too many times.

" _These are the bodies of all the knights that have died under your command_." The cold voice murmurs in my right ear, I can feel his warm breath on my neck, as his fingers trace the edges of my face.

"T-that's impossible….it c-can't be …. how could this many die because of me?" I hear my voice crack and tears fill my eyes.

" _Hehehe…. you fool, it's because you're weak."_ the voice's owner walks around me. I take my trembling hands away from my tear stained face to see my enemy. I find myself staring into two pairs of electric purple eyes, scleras deadly black, hair white, and he's wearing an all black body suit, and a crazed smile.

" _You may be weak and dying now, but I can help_." The white haired boy says holding out a hand to me with a smirk.

 _"I'll bring you back to the world of the living with more power than you thought was ever possible_ ," he grins, _"but there's a little catch."_

" _The power I will give you will be in exchange for your sanity….that's how the Dark El works..."_

I feel my blood start to boil.

So many have died because I'm weak against the demons, I've always been fighting a losing war, but I'll stop that here. I'll wage a bloody vengeance against the demons from now on! There pay for what they've done. My sanity is not important compared to the lives of my fallen knights.

I reach out and seize the stranger's hand.

He steps closer to me with a grin, we're face to face now. Im staring into his eyes again. He moves even closer. I feel his breath on my lips, then he's kissing me.  
I feel a cold of an avalanche press down on my body, as my blood runs burning through my veins, my heads spinning, darkness leaks into my eyes as I black out.

I sense the chill of stone pressing down on my skin, I try to move but nothing happens. I open my eyes. I'm in a dungeon half buried under a collapsed castle wall. It starts to come back to me. The Red Knights had attacked the Underground Capital in hopes of killing the Amethyst Demon Sorcerer, but obviously that hadn't happened. My memory is shattered but I still see bits of how we were ambushed, but after that what happened? My head throbs violently as I try to remember.

It's no use so I turn my attention to getting out from my trappings. I drag myself forward with as much strength as I can manage. I pull myself out of the rubble. My left leg is numb and when I look down I see it's streaming with blood, and there's a deep cut across my side, I see the flesh gaping wide the fat and white of skin is all visible, but strangely I feel no pain at all. I lazily glance around me looking for my claymore. It's sticking out of the rubble its form has changed, its once small blade is now a spiked dread weapon. I pull it from the stones. Its not as heavy as it looks. The red and black steel glimmers in the orange of torch light.

"We need to avenge them…." I whisper to my blade.

I sense a figure in front of me, I look up its Elsword, he's ghostly pale, His ribs and flesh are exposed by a horrible gash across his chest leaking scarlet everywhere.

"You couldn't save us…..." Elsword whispers in a deadly tone.

Cold terror sinks over me, my eyes fill with tears of horror and grief. I run to him but as my fingers reach out to hold him, he vanishes into black smoke. I grasp at the mist trying to hold onto something, anything.

I fall to my knees in Elsword's blood. My scream of despair echoes through the dark cold dungeon walls. Tears stream from my eyes but I'm laughing, I can't control it,

 _What's wrong with me?_  
 _Was it my fault_  
 _Of course it was!_  
 _Because i'm weak!_  
 _Always so weak_  
 _B-but,_  
 _But i'll change that now…._

I stand up strangely composed. I hear the clank of armor behind me, I spin around eyes blazing, until this moment I had not noticed the Glitter Demons closing in around me from all sides there eyes glowing with blood lust, but my eyes burn with the same passion to kill as there's. I dash forward and swing my claymore. A strange thing happens. The blood from my wounds surround the blade making it twice its original length. I take down 8 demons with one swing. a smile moves across my lips, as the stone floor is running with blood.

I love this.

I make short work of the rest of the demons.

I find my way out of the Underground Capital without crossing paths with anymore enemies. I reach the great wooden doors to the outside and push them open.  
The orange glow of dusk welcomes me as the wind whispers through my long hair. I can see the lights and smell the campfire smoke of Feita. I walk through the ruins of great castles, my wounds are still bleeding a lot, and my head is spinning, but I have to tell the knights in Feita I'm alive!

* * *

 _ **Please Review. Even if you dont like it, review.**_


	2. Knight's Stigma

**This Fanfiction is written by Rogue Knight.**

 **Knight's Stigma**

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 **Add P.O.V**

Never before had I seen a knight of such beauty, though I am not a man of such vain things, but I felt something I thought I had lost a long long time ago. I felt a warmness, some kind of feeling towards this Red Knight. I can hardly believe I can still feel something. i thought the madness had completely taken me over, but I guess I miscalculated, but what have I, no, it done? It should have not brought her back she should not be here in the world of the living, but it is too late now. Right now I can only try to slow down what I know is inevitable.

I stand on the crumbling roof of the Underground Capital, I see the Red Knight stumble out of the front doors, she's more charming than when she was fully alive. She's dripping in blood as she staggers over the crevices of the destroyed cities. She leaves a path of red behind her, her hair is a pretty rose shade and her now amber eyes glow with a lust for blood and vengeance.

I watch her make her way to the little party of tents and shelters of the small village to the west chased by dark ominous clouds from the great tower that can be seen from far and wide.

Feita Temple is what I've heard it called, next to it is the village, tiny in comparison.

The knights haven't been here for long, maybe five months at the most. I've been wondering around here, through dark dungeons and dangerous fields, looking for something to entertain me, I guess i've finally found something, no, someone worthy of my attention.

I smile to myself, the disconnectedness fades, and my sanity returns as I set off after the Red Haired Knight.

She stumbles into the village and is surrounded by knights yelling and screaming their joy and then their horror. The Red Knight at this point is exhausted and collapses at there feet coughing up blood and stomach acid, tears streaming down her face. the knights hesitate not knowing what to do.

The Captain kneels down and asks urgent questions that don't reach my ears. The Red Knight starts shaking and giggling. She looks up at the captain grinning and laughing now, blood running from her mouth.

The Captain steps back fear growing in his eyes. He shouts something to his men, but the next second his head is gone. Flying through the air to roll over the damp grass to never be found. the Red Knight kicks down the headless body and stabs it repeatedly. The other knights stare frozen with shock and terror. By the time they start to realize who their enemy is, it's far too late.

Screams echo through the ruins as the evening creeps on.

By the time the moon has peeked out from behind the slivers of clouds the camp is in flames, ashes falling like snow.

I walk through the burning tents. Bodies litter the ground. The smell of fresh blood has stained the air mixing with smoke.

I find the Red Knight unconscious at the edge of the camp. I kneel down and scoop her up in my arms. Her skin is pale and freezing cold covered in death.

"Don't fight anymore, my _Crimson Avenger_ …." I whisper to her

I open a time rift in space and take us millions of miles away to a small city far to the south, Ruben.

 **author's note: when Add says "it" at the beginning of the chapter he is referring to the diabolic insane side of him. (that's the side that brought Elesis back to life)**

* * *

 _ **Please Review. Even if you dont like it, review.**_


	3. Amber Eyes to Cry

**This Fanfiction is written by Rogue Knight.**

 **Amber Eyes to Cry**

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 **Elesis P.O.V**

My body feels heavy, the feeling is strangely familiar. I can feel the warmth of sunlight on my face. I squint my eyes open. The ceiling above me is a copper wood color. I sit up and look at my new surroundings, golden yellow in the morning light. I'm in a small room with walls of wood. The great set of windows next to my neatly made bed are wide open. Little insects fly inside and out. the cries of bird's mating calls and the sounds of the forest drift through the window echoing in the house.

"Oh you're awake, How are you feeling?" a soft but clear male voice says.

I look to the doorway of the room. A young man is standing there, as he walks over to me i notice his eyes are shade of electric purple, almost pink. They hypnotize me for a second.

His hair is white, a rare trait to have. There's also a slight scar across his left eye.

He sits down in the chair placed next to the bed. I feel like I've seen him before somewhere, but I can't put my finger on it.

"So…?" he says with a slight laugh

"Oh right, fine, I suppose but I am hungry." I reply with a bit of embarrassment. I was so absorbed by him I forgot about his question.

" That's to be expected You have been asleep for two weeks" He says.

"Really? What happened to me…?" I try to swallow the fear in my voice. This is strange. My mind is blank. I know how to function but I don't remember how i got here, where I was a month ago. Any people or names, I know things about myself. Elesis was the name i was given, and I'm 19, everything else to hazy to have any real meaning.

"Don't worry, I'll explain everything, but first let's eat."

"Wait, who are you? what's your name?" I ask

"Call me Add, and you are?"

"I'm...Elesis"

" You should get dressed, Elesis." Add says, drawing out my name as tho it's something to be careful with. He stands and gestures to a white dress laid out in front of me. That's when I realized I'm one just in my underwear and covered in blood soaked bandages. I stare down at myself in shock.

"God, what happened to me…?" I whisper, half to myself half to him.

"I said I'd tell you, but get dressed…" Add says from the doorway, turned away. I pull on the white dress. It's strange I feel no pain as I move. could i have been completely healed in two weeks? Is that possible? Maybe with some kind of healing magic?

Who is this Add anyway, He wouldn't have anything to gain by lying to me, at least I hope not.

I want to trust him.

I assume he did save me after all.

I don't sense he's a bad person.

I join Add at the doorway. I notice he's quite taller than me, at least 5 inches.

Add leads me down the hall. The kitchen is filled with the same golden light as the bedroom. The smell of fried eggs and sausage waft through the air. Add motions to the table, already set with food waiting. I sit down and dig right in. Its full of flavor and I would say it's the best food I've ever eaten but I have nothing to compare it to, with my memory being a blank.

When I've cleared my plate, I look at him inquisitively, clearing my throat. He sees the seriousness in my eyes.

"So do explain how I got here and why I can't remember anything."

Add swallows his last sip of tea.

"Very well, two weeks ago I found you unconscious in a far away place, the land of Feita. you were a knight, you see this kingdom has been at war with demons and spirits for many years. you were a knight in a party of very skilled warriors, The Red Knights. tho you and your men were strong you were ambushed. your party and camp was wiped out by the demons. I was in the area at the time and saw the smoke from the destruction and I came as quickly as I could, but I was too late. I tried finding anyone who was still alive, I almost gave up, but then I found you. you were practically dead but you hung on to life. I had a few healing elixirs with me at the time and I was able to carry you to a town not to far from the knights camp. I found more help there. we rested there a week and then I brought you here. as for your dementia I can imagine it was quite traumatic so I think your mind has perhaps locked away those memories so as to not harm the body. " Add finishes his story and thoughts, he looks up to me keen on seeing my reaction.

I sit there in shock, me a knight?

I think back. I really think back, it's still fuzzy but I can see it. I can see the knights, I can see glimmers of us fighting, winning, losing, dying... I can see the blood but there's no way i'm going to remember everything. No faces, no names, no details, just a big red blur.

My head starts throbbing and I feel tears running down my cheeks even tho I don't really feel sad.

I don't really feel anything.

* * *

 _ **Please Review. Even if you dont like it, review.**_


	4. Time Control

**This Fanfiction is written by Rogue Knight.**

 **Time Control**

* * *

 **Add P.O.V**  
I am playing a dangerous game with myself. I know my sanity is not stable. It's been eating away at me for years. I know I shouldn't be telling her this story not like this, but if I tell her the truth she will fall into full darkness like i have. If I tell her the truth it will get what it wants. It brought her back to life using my hands, It sees her power and wants it.

I was starting to give in to it, I started to want to destroy everything, to kill, to end this world, but I saw Elesis, and now i don't want to give into it.  
but i know.

I can't control it. When it comes it controls me.

It wants her to fall into darkness so she can destroy the world with it.

I have no idea how long i can stop it.

I'm scared

That's why my hands tremble as I hand Elesis a tissue.

I stand up and walk to the bedroom, to the closet I pull from it a red scarf with the Velder kingdom's crest embroidered into its burnt and fraying cloth.

I return to the table and wrap the scarf around Elesis shoulders.

"I found this that night, it's not much but it's something to remember them by…"

I need Elesis to trust me, this might be a small step in the right direction.

Elesis looks up at me tears still in her eyes, but she's smiling

"Thank you so much" she utters touching the scarf at her neck. "It means the world"

I start cleaning up from breakfast. Elesis is just sitting there examining her hands, lost in thought.  
after a while she looks up to me

"Add, can you take me back to Feita, I need to kill the demons, that was my job, I need to avenge the fallen knights, it's what I need to do. I don't expect you to stay with me and fight, I'll be fine on my own. but I need you to show me the way back."

I swallow I was afraid this might happen, no, I knew this would happen. her insanity is hiding in the shadows of her eyes filled with a bloodlust and hatred. I know there's no way i'm talking her out of this.

"Very well, I'll take you back to Feita...but I'm not leaving you alone there."

"Thank you, when can we leave then?"

"As soon as you're ready"

"I need my combat gear and claymore, you have them right?"

"Indeed"

I lead her to my study. Nasod parts and materials strewn across the great desk, bookshelves line the north and east walls, graphs, calculations, papers full of space manipulation theories, schematics, blueprints for different Dynamos, formulas, and the time travel equation all cover the walls and creep even to the ceiling.  
the papers that didn't make it to the walls are scattered across the floor.

I've placed Elesis's claymore on my table along with her clothes. I hand them both to her. she stares around my lab in awe.

"There's a bathroom over there" I point to the door at the opposite side of the room.

"Thanks" she says as she walks to the door, closing it quietly behind her. I pick up my set of Dynamos and power them up. they levitate for a few seconds then arrange themselves around me. I walk to my closet and pull my black combat bodysuit from the shelf.

"Dynamos" freeze time for 2 minutes then return to normal functions."

The Dynamos glow slightly with electricity as they carry out my command.

I feel the air around me grow still.

I undress, fold my clothes and put them aside.

I slip on the bodysuit and pull the jet black jacket over.  
a few seconds later I sense the air start to move again.

I lean against my desk, I laugh to myself a little, I can control time so well it's almost second nature. I think back to the first day I had stopped time. It felt like ages before I was able to get the right calculation and material to fix it.

I hear the bathroom door open, I look up. Elesis is standing in the doorway her outfit is form fitting and she looks puzzled.

"Is something the matter?" I ask from across the room

"My eyes, there amber now, it's... just strange…do you know why?" Elesis asks as she walks to stand next to me. she takes in my new outfit, my heart skips a beat praying she won't remember, she says nothing.

"No clue" I answer.

 _It's a lie, taking in that much Dark El is bound to change a person._

"But I like your amber eyes.. there unique" I say with a little smile. Her eyes sparkle with gold caramel at this comment.

"So how are we reaching Feita? Will we need horses? " Elesis asks.

"Hehe that's cute, i didn't tell you but i have the ability to control time and space as you know it"  
I sweep her up in my arms so quickly she can't react.

"Dynamos; location coordinates: 37.7925, -80.519167."

Time and space is distorted for a few seconds, opening a wormhole in space I stepping through it. The next second we're standing in the chill of early morning in a field of damp grass and hard cold stone of old and crushed walls.

The are stars still visible and not yet swallowed by the rays of the sunrise.

I put Elesis down gently.

"I'm sorry I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable…" I say "It's just the safest way to travel through space like that…." _yeah that sounds believable._ I think to myself.

"It's fine, I understand the situation " Elesis says looking around us.

"So this is Feita"

"We're in a place called Pilgrims Site, we need to be careful there are demons hiding everywhere"

Elesis steps forward, claymore raised, eyes glowing with hate.

"Let them find us, i'll massacre them all. They shouldn't have messed with me…"

 **author's note: when Add says "it" he is referring to the diabolic insane side of him.**

* * *

 _ **Please Review. Even if you dont like it, review.**_


	5. Living Dead

**This Fanfiction is written by Rogue Knight.**

 ** **Living Dead****

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 **Elesis P.O.V  
**

I don't feel the blood pouring from my flesh, I don't feel the cold of constant demise around me,

I don't feel the pain of death.

I only feel the rage racing through my body, the bloodlust, the desire to kill.

I cut, smash, and rip my way through the mob of demons. Like Add said this land is infested with the repulsive creatures.

I look to Feita Tower, dark purple clouds surrounding it. The mobs of demons must be coming from somewhere. and I have a good idea it's from the tower. I look back to the demons they're vile, ruled by mad instincts, but I'm ruled by the desire to kill.

 _This is what they get  
his is what they deserve  
They can all return to rot in the hell they crawled out of!  
I'll avenge them, the lost knights, I have to avenge them!  
I'll destroy the demons  
kill  
kill  
Kill!  
Till there's none of them fucking left!  
_

I dash toward the last glitter demon, rushing past him turning around. I strike my claymore deep into its back. I hear bones break and flesh tear. I pull my sword back laughing as I kick him down to the already blood soaked earth. I dig my sword into the demon's chest making it howl in pain I laugh even harder. The demons groans subside and so does my laughter. I look down disappointed it died so quickly. What a shame.

As I stare at the dying demon my head violently throbs, my vision starts to blur, for a second I think I see not a demon at my feet, but a knight. I shut my eyes and shake my head but when I open them again the picture is even more clear. The knight grabs at my feet moaning through mouthfuls of blood. I can't move, i'm frozen with horror. The knight tries pulling himself up but crumples back to the ground where he remains still and silent blood oozing out of him like glue. I can move again but as I step back the blood red glob surrounds my feet slowing my movements. I try hacking at the glue but my claymore is dragged down as it engulfs me, pulling me, drowning me.

I can't move, I can't scream. I can't fight.

The blood glue is to my chin and rising fast I fill my lungs with as much oxygen as I can. its to my ears. I shut my eyes as the blood completely submerges me. I hold my breath for what feels like ages, my lungs are burning, head throbbing even more painfully. I can't hold on much longer.

I can't!

I fill my lungs with the crimson sludge.

Every nerve in my body screams, my ears ring, as I fall into the darkness of unconsciousness.

"Elesis"

"Come on wake up."

I hear Adds voice calling me. but it sounds so far away his blurry face is hovering over me, he looks anxious. The chill of morning still hangs in the air and leaks into my lungs.

"Oh hey Add…what happened?..." I mutter.

"Well…" He says looking around. "You massacred every demon within a five mile radius."

I laugh at this. "good..". I say. He looks slightly frustrated.

"I found you sobbing in a puddle of blood, it's not good."

I smile at him "My sanity or emotional well being is not important, all I need to do is fight"

He looks away I can see him start to tremble, he's clutching his left eye. His breath is shaking

"Kuhahak, you fool, that **is** good. Hey, come on Elesis give into the insanity. It will be better that way..."

Add looks me in the eyes, I stumble back in shock. His scleras are black and he's grinning madly. He cups my face in his hands and stares into my eyes, shivers run down my frame.

"If you just give in, we will be able to do it, we can kill every demon, we can destroy this dreadful world. You have incredible power. You are an amazing weapon, You feel no pain, the more you die the more powerful your insanity and attacks become. You could fight for ages so long as you still have blood in your body … kuahaha you're basically invincible, but of course not as invincible as me, the Diabolic Esper."

He moves even closer to me as he talks, I'm hypnotized by his every word. He's close enough for me to see a crazy lust dripping from his eyes. Add starts to kiss my neck, tracing my shoulders and spine with his hands.

"A-Add stop.." I try pushing him away, but he holds me tighter, laughing into my skin as his kisses move down to my collarbone and chest. My breath catches in my throat as Add pulls me down to the cold stone.

My heart starts racing.

"Add stop it!" I slap him hard across the face, I shove him off me and scurry a few feet away from him laying face down in the bloody stone road. I snatch up my claymore and hold it before me, trembling.

 _was I a fool to trust him so easily? that's not it. this isn't him...this is someone else...something else….maybe…._

For a good ten seconds Add just lays there, then he starts to move again, I grip my claymore even tighter. Add raises his head to look at me.

The whites of his eyes are no longer black, but they see the fear in mine.

"Elesis? w-what happened, what did I do?" His voice is thick with worry. I say nothing as I step farther away from him.

"Did I hurt you? god please tell me I didn't." There's a slight tone of panic now.

"No you didn't... Let's just get out of here." I say coldly, as I cover half my face with the dark blood red scarf he'd given me.

* * *

 _ **Please Review. Even if you dont like it, review.**_


	6. Are You Paranoid?

**This Fanfiction is written by Rogue Knight.**

 **Are You Paranoid?**

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 **Add P.O.V  
**

"Come on Elesis, Please tell me what did I do?" I plead as I walk beside her. She looks at me eyes filled with ice. She grabs my jacket collar and pulls me close aggressively, she kisses my neck hard.

"You did that." She spits, pushing me away. I feel my cheeks grow slightly warm. I shake my head.

I shouldn't be blushing.

"I'm... sorry Elesis, I don't know what came over me, it's hard to explain" I look away hoping she'll maybe understand

She looks at me, not with anger anymore, more curiously.

"I just want an explanation later. Got it?" Elesis says, as she slows her pace to walk beside me again.

"I understand." I reply

"Okay, that's for later but now…" She says glaring up to Feita Tower looming over us. "...The mobs are coming from this tower right? If we destroy it we can end the demons." Elesis says, piercing lust for vengeance back in her eyes.

As we walk up through the towers hallways and the rubble of stairs the feeling of unease grows with every step. I look to Elesis I can tell she notices it too, but we say nothing.

The temple seems to be empty, _maybe the demons have pulled back because of Elesis' attack?  
or something else?  
_

Suddenly the walkway comes to an end, falling away many feet below us. We stop and gaze down at the pitfall, a sea of glitter demons stare up at us, eyes glowing red. There must be at least a hundred, but being so far below us they serve no threat at the moment.

The walkway hasn't been destroyed completely, edges are still here so we carefully make our way past and over the pit of demons.

Once we've reached the other end of the broken hallway the Dark El energy is so thick it's almost suffocating. There's one more flight of stairs till we reach the top of Feita tower. We stumble and drag ourselves up the stone steps. Once on the top stairs we see him, The Great Demon Commander Berthe.

He's titanic dark wolf like demon, roaring at the top of his lungs when he lays, white with rage, eyes on us. I cover my ears. The Dark El energy is even stronger here. my head is pounding, I feel it digging away at the back of my mind, It wants to fight, it wants to kill. My insanity is going to come back.

I glance at Elesis, I can see the Dark El is affecting her too. her hands are shaking and pale. She stands frozen staring at Berthe.

"He's too strong...we can't do it...we're gonna die...die….die-" She whispers under her breath the light fading from her eyes.

I reach over and take Elesis' sweaty cold hand in my own.

"No, we can do it, for the knights, come on, he's nothing." I squeeze her hand as i say this. I know we can beat him, it's just a matter of time and strategy.

Berthe starts moving our way still roaring with madness.

"I choose not to close this gateway. The time has come. Witness this! This world will be ruled by demons! you weak humans will not get in the way" Berthe growls.

There's a Dark Gateway's open mouth swirling behind him, Berthe must be keeping it open with all his Dark El, meaning if we defeat him…

Elesis and I break hands as we break into runs, circling him to attack from both sides at the same time.

"Moonlight Rhapsody" I whisper to my Dynamos, This skill will destroy Berthes mind, but this might help or hurt us, he'll become more reckless.

When the skill hits him he starts clawing at his own head, scratching away at his flesh and yowling even more. Elesis taking this opening. surrounding her claymore in dark energy and her own blood, rushes forward, rotating quickly, slashing Berthes chest repeatedly. He stumbles back roaring, good this is going well, but with every second I can feel my sanity slipping.

Berthe pulls his claws away from his now scratched and blood dripping head. He turns to me and howls, a great blast of icy cold Dark El shoots through me, I feel like my organs are turning to ice, I clutch at my chest falling to my knees. The ice is in my lungs now I cough and gasp for air but with every second it gets harder to breathe. I taste the salt of blood in my mouth. Berthe is towering above me now. I try moving but my bones are frozen as well. Berthe raises his claw ready to attack.

"Add get out of the way!" Elesis yells.

 _Shit, come on, move!  
_

I'm panicking, this can't be my end not like this!

I feel the darkness of insanity seeping into my eyes. as a grin forms at the edges of my mouth.

" _Pathetic…. You're so pathetic_ " A voice whispers to me from inside my head, as I blackout.

The darkness lifts from my eyes and I can see again. but I also feel as well.

The pain hits me hard, my lungs burn, my bones ache and scream, I feel the cold air touch my open flesh. I cough a mouthful of blood up and watch it splatter to the already blood drenched shrine floor. I look up into Elesis' amber eyes full of tears. She's holding both my hands in her shaking ones.

"Add? Are you back?" She whispers there's blood dripping from her mouth as well.

It takes me a second to find my own voice.

"Yeah…. it's me..." I murmur to her through teeth gritted in pain. She wraps her arms around me and holds me painfully tight.

"I was scared you weren't going to come back…" She whispers into my ear. That's when I see Berhes lying lifeless covered in a coat of blood as well, his flesh ripped and gaping. Bones piercing through his skin, broken and mangled, eyes staring white and dead into mine.

 _Dear god, did I do that?_  
 _oh right, of course I did._

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 _ **Please Review. Even if you dont like it, review.**_


	7. Shadow's Edge

**This Fanfiction is written by Rogue Knight.**

 **Shadow's Edge**

* * *

 **Elesis P.O.V**

I sit in the warmth of late afternoon next to Add's bed. He's awake but we both feel like there's not much to say.

We are in Velder. We've been here for about three weeks and Add's condition has been improving slowly. The kingdom of Velder is vast with many towns, castles and towers, and just like Feita overrun with demons, but it's a safe enough place as any in this battle.

After Add's Dark Esper side came out, he destroyed Berthe in a matter of minutes. I had no idea he had that kind of power, but it must take a great toll on him. many of his bones were broken, he was bleeding internally, and he can hardly remember any of it.

Thanks to Add the gate of darkness Berthe had opened up was closed, but I still had to get Add out of there before he bled to death. Being able to control my blood to an extent, I used it to hold Add's wounds together, and stop the bleeding somewhat. I managed to carry him down through the tower and over the ruins, moving to the east. As i proceed the sky became darker, full of ominous clouds with strange lights in the sky, even tho it was mid day. After wandering through more demolished castles and graveyards I came to a great wall with the same crest on its mighty red doors as my scarf, I cried up to the guards and they rushed down to help us. They attended to our wounds as quickly as we got inside the walls of the Velder kingdom.

My wounds had almost completely healed themselves, but Add was still in a life threatening state.

I learned that the Red Knights were a branch of the Velder Knights, They had heard of my party's annihilation and told me Add and I were welcome to stay and live in Velder as long as we needed.

For now we can only wait until Add is fully healed before we can continue fighting the demons in Velder.

Add groans as he stares at the ceiling.

"Bored?" I ask as I sit on the edge of his bed.

"Nooooo, why would I be bored?" Add says, his voice laced with sarcasm.

I smirk "Well get used to it already, you're no way healed enough to walk more than five feet yet"

"Oh, well I'm sorry i can't regenerate my bones like somebody...my dynamos aren't that strong"

"Hey, I haven't broken any bones yet so we don't know that"

"There's blood in your bones right? that means you should be able too"

"True true, but we still don't know how it works."

Add looks back to the ceiling as if it might hold the answers.

'Hey.. I wonder if you can die?"

"Do you want me to"

"What? god no, I was just thinking if you regenerate than maybe it's impossible for you to die?"

I look at my black gloved hands, I guess he doesn't remember he told me that as long as I still have blood in my body i'm practically invincible.

"But i'm already half dead you know?"

"Wow, I guess you are"

"Oh do you have a problem with that to?"

"Not at all, I just never thought a half dead person could be so lovely"

I feel my face grow red.

"Um yeah whatever you say.." I mutter looking away. The shadows of evening begin to creep through the window, I stand up.

"I should go make supper, do you have any requests?"

Add smiles "surprise me."

It surprises me that Add actually likes my cooking. Its nothing amazing, I can barely make soup. But he wolfs it down like it's the best thing in the world.

After washing dishes i'm tired and ready for bed.

I lay down in bed, striped with white moonlight, next to Add. I pull the heavy warm blankets over us. I turn over to face him.

"Goodnight, sleep well and sweet dreams" I whisper to him, already half asleep.

"Goodnight love…" Add mutters into his pillow.

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 _ **Please Review. Even if you dont like it, review.**_


	8. Stardust Memory

**This fanfiction is written by Rogue Knight**

 **Stardust Memory**

* * *

 **Add P.O.V**

 ****I'm standing in a Nasod lab, parts littered across the tables and floor. The chill in the air raises the hair on the back of my neck. I hear a child's laughter coming from outside the room, I follow the sound out of the arctic chill of the lab thru a grand doorway into the warmth of a living room. Sunlight drifts thru the windows, open in the golden heat of afternoon. Family portraits cover the tall walls all subjects sharing the same fair white hair, the furniture is expensive and everything is all too familiar.  
I walk a bit out into the room. I see a boy with snow white hair and bright eyes grinning over a book lying open on the floor. I freeze.

This boy is me.

He looks up and we meet eyes.

He closes the book and stands up to slowly walk over to me. i feel cold sweat on my forehead. He stands in front of me now. I stare down, He glares up.

"W-what's wrong" I ask him, feeling my voice shake.

"You shouldn't be here, Diabolic Esper" He says in a cold tone."Mother and Father will be very cross..."

Suddenly blackness fades over my eyes. When it passes I'm standing outside, at the edge of the shadow of my great house in early morning air.  
I see my breath like smoke drift in front of me. My heart starts pounding in my chest, the beating pounds through my head. It grows louder with every second, I can hardly take it. I cover my ears and shut my eyes tight but it doesn't help at all. Just when i feel as tho my head might split in two.  
it stops.

I open my eyes and look up, now in deadly silence. a woman and man are laying on the floor in front of me. There are smashed Nasod parts everywhere the charts and graphs that had cover the walls have been ripped off, replaced by blood splatters. I stumble back as I cry out in horror.

The corpses are my parents.

Standing over them is a dark figure, it's laughing to itself softly. It looks up at me. I stare back at myself again. The figure looks exactly like me, but his scleras are a toxic black. He grins as we meet eyes.

"You killed them, Diabolic Esper…"He says laughing wickedly as the room fades to black.

 _You killed them  
You killed them…  
YOU KILLED THEM!_

My eyes snap open, I sit up in bed, I'm drenched in cold sweat.

I slowly lay back down as I realize it was just another nightmare…

I look over to see the sleeping Elesis next to me. I'm suddenly filled with overwhelming gratitude towards this Dark Knight, no one has ever stuck around me for very long. I usually push them away.

She looks so peaceful I wish I could keep her like this forever, with her light red hair softly falling over her eyes, with only the sound of her breathing and heart beat in the room, but I can't control a timeline of someone else's life. Only my own.

If I was able to I would have stopped the Red Knights ambush, which in doing so would have stopped Elesis' death. The Seal of Time brought her back, but she's not truly alive she did die that day. It's in her past and I can't change her past. I failed at changing my own after all.

* * *

 **Please review, even if you dont like it, review.**


	9. Blood Cutter

**This Fanfiction is written by Rogue Knight**

 **Blood Cutter**

* * *

 **Elesis P.O.V**

I wake to the sound of Add sobbing. I feel him next to me shaking with tears. I slowly sit up and reach through the dim light and find his hand. He stops crying almost immediately.

"Hey what's wrong." I whisper, I can hardly see his face in the darkness of late night, early morning, but I make out his trembling lips and damp eyes.  
I lean over and wipe his tears away.

"Did you see a ghost again" I tease. hoping this might cheer him up.

Add says nothing.

" I'm sorry...I shouldn't be joking around. " I sense this is more serious.

"Was it a nightmare? I thought you said you were used to them…" I mumble.  
I feel him sigh, he turns away.

"I lied…" I hear a slight painful laugh run from his lips.

"But it helps that I'm not alone anymore." He says squeezing my ice cold hand.

I haven't been sleeping well myself. I stay awake for the rest of the night replaying the bits of memories of the past I have, long after Add falls back to sleep.

Many nights pass like this.

I've become extremely restless from just waiting around for weeks, so when Add can finally walk again i'm beyond over joyed. I run thru the streets of Velder laughing, pulling Add behind me. We make our way into the heart of Velder where the demons are the thickest. I let go of Adds hand as i hurl myself full force into a group of Glitter Demons. I cut limbs and spill guts, covering my hands and arms with their blood.

"Having fun?" Add says as he walks behind me.

"Yesss!" I laugh and skip as I twirl my claymore on my wrist, drops of blood flying thru the air. Add wipes a bit of blood from his cheek and sighs. We continue to walk thru the allyways seeing corpses every now and again.

I start to feel sick, hatred building up inside me even more. I break into a run again, I need to kill, destroy the demons, they need to pay for what they've done!

I bolt out of the alley into a square, littered with fresh bodies of both demon and men.

I see a small party of knights cowering away from a towering Glitter Demon with a sinewy build, but great arms that, as I watch in horror smash the nearest knight to him. The knight's cry hangs in the air for many slow seconds than the rest of the party scatter. As they run from the glitter Hound. I charge to the demon and swing my sword with everything I have.

I hear his right arm crash to the stone road behind me, I grin as I sevor his left arm in another rushing quick attack. He howls in pain than anger. Roaring he gallops toward me eyes blazing from behind his heavy armor.

I ready my stance, gathering as much blood and Dark El as I can. the Glitter Hound is right before me now, I bring the blade up, spinning it in my fingers, than releasing it, a second claymore of darkness whirls forward slicing the Glitter Hound in two.

He shakes the ground as he falls.

I stand over him, staring down, I feel my eyes begin to glaze my head feels so light, the sky starts to spin as I fall backwards. but I don't hit the ground, instead I feel strong arms catch me. When my vision comes back into focus I see its Add. He helps me to my feet.

That's when I notice the small party of knights are surrounding us. Looking at me in awe. One of them steps forward, head bowed.

"Thank so very much, great knight, You saved me and my men's lives, your power is truly amazing, My name is Penensio, Chief of Velders Red Knights. " The Captain stammers while staring at the destroyed Glitter Demon.

"There is no need for thanks, it's only important that there were no more casualties" I reply as I wipe my claymore of blood. I take Adds sleeve and turn around to go.

"Wait! please, you're a fearsome knight! I've never seen anyone like you. We need someone of your ability. Would you... could you lead the Velder Knights? With a power like yours we could demolish the demons in a matter of days. Think about it! We would be unstoppable with you"

Suddenly I get a flood of memories, but they're even more vivid this time.

Bodies

So many dead bodies.

There faces and wounds icy clear in my memory.

There's so much blood. The color is so bright burning into my eyes, drowning me with its hard iron smell. I feel my stomach knot, I turn away from the knights and puke. The taste of vomit shuts out The memories the stone street comes back into focus. I feel Adds hand on my back trying to soothe me. As my own hands shake uncontrollably.

* * *

 **Please Review. Even if you dont like it review.**


	10. Vermilion Nausea

**This Fanfiction is written by Rogue Knight**

 **Vermilion Nausea**

* * *

 **Add P.O.V**

 ****I help Elesis to her knobbly knees.

"I -I can't..their be killed, their be injured...I can't" Elesis is muttering under her breath slightly panicked.

"Tell them what needs to be said, they have to understand" I say, as I hold her hands even tighter. Elesis swallows and steps forward.

Her voice shaking like her hands at first but gaining strength.

"I am sorry, Velder Knight but I can not lead your party, I fight alone. at times my power is uncontrollable and I would not be able to guarantee your safety."  
The knight looks slightly taken it back, but he still protests.

"But please reconsider! I'm begging you. We'll be killed if you don't!"

Elesis' knees begin to shake again, Her eyes glaze over as they fill with tears. I step forward and ease my arms around her, holding her close again. I stroke her head softly, trying to smooth her memories that fill me with a strange guilt. I feel Elesis' fingers dig into my back, as tho I'm the sanity she's trying to hold on to. Next second she pulls away, eyes dead, but full of blood lust.

"Elesis stop" I say grabbing at her hand trying to prevent her from what I'm paranoid is coming. she pulls her arm away violently. She steps over the Glitter Hound's corpse, bringing her feet down hard to splinter bones and smash flesh. The knights seem to sense something is off. They hover warily as Elesis walks up to them.

"Have you changed your mind Red Knight?" The Chief Knight asks a sliver of dread in his voice. Elesis looks up, her cold dead eyes meeting the knight's dark brown ones.

"...no..."

She whispers as her claymore cuts thru the knights armor sinking deep into his flesh. The knight screams in horror as Elesis stabs him again, and again. The other knight don't seem to believe what's happening.

There savor, may now be there death.

Elesis turns to them but doesn't move just stands there in a daze.

In this moment of hesitation the knight's leap on her. Smashing her body to the ground. I hear her nose crack and see it bleed into the stone. She struggles and squirms but the knights are heavy.

 _You animals! You're disgusting don't touch her  
_

I rush forward and kick a knight off her, I feel his ribs break with the force of the strike. Elesis manages to grasp her claymore and rip it thru her captors. She slashes at the knight nears to her, his blood splatters far across the cobblestone street as he falls, Elesis wheels around and crushes the skull of the small knight I had kicked down. the sound of breaking cartilage and bones fill the air. Three knights are left they raise there shaking swords as Elesis gives them a wide eyed look of glee.

My stomach turns as there guts are spilled. I don't enjoy the destruction like I used to….

I feel the thickness of death in the air as Elesis continues to slaughter the Velder knights. My heart sinks when I hear the last knight's cry of despair. I see Elesis collapse to the ground where she lays laughing drenched in blood.

I myself feel a bit of fear in my heart as I slowly walk to kneel beside her.

"Hey Add...I remember..I remember everything" Elesis's speaks thru her bloody nose.

I freeze.

My heart skipping a beat.

"W-what?" I don't even try to hide the fear in my own voice.

"I remember everything..."

* * *

 **Please Review. Even if you dont like it review.**


	11. FATE SMASH

**This Fanfiction is written by Rogue Knight**

 **FATE SMASH**

* * *

 **Elesis P.O.V**  
The knight's blood covers me as I stagger to my feet. The blood from my nose pours down my face filling my mouth with salty red. I stare at Add.

I remember him.

I remember meeting him in the dark.

Taking his hand.

I remember his cold kiss.

I remember my dear brothers death.

My dear knights deaths.

Caused by me.

I remember their blood on my hands.

I now know it was all my fault.

I killed them.

Oh god.

I've done it again.

Everything Add told me was a lie.

I look into his bright purple eyes.

"why?" I ask.

"Why did you lie to me?"

"WHY?" I scream as I lunge for him. My blood soaked hands meeting his throat, but they don't squeeze the life from him yet, they shake as they wait for his answer.

"Elesis…" Add's voice is trembling. "I-I couldn't tell you...it would destroy you…" Tears of anger well up in my eyes.

"WHATS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW?!" I scream, I begin to wring his neck, but he doesn't fight back. I stop. I shove him away than kick him to the hard ground.

"I'M ALREADY DEAD YOU FOOL! KNOWING THE TRUTH WOULDN'T CHANGE ANYTHING!" I yell as I kick his face and chest. His own nose is bleeding now.

I reach down and pull him up by his collar, blood streaming down his bruised face. I feel the tears of hate burning down my cheeks. Add still doesn't try to fight back, he doesn't even try to get away.

"Did you think you could keep me from remembering? DID YOU REALLY THINK THAT? ANSWER ME ADD!" I cry in his face.  
He looks me in the eyes.

"Everything I said was a lie, I am selfish and stubborn. I did not calculate this would happen so soon." Add clenches his fists at the thought of his errors.

"If you knew this would happen why didn't you tell me in the first place damnit!"

"Elesis" He whispers my name guilt dripping from his words "I think...I think I fell for you. The time I've spend with you is the most sane I've felt for a long time. So i wanted to make it last as long as possible. It's naive but I wanted to save you even after you'd died. That was why i lied."

I glare into Adds eyes trying to find a hint of denial, a sign that he's joking. but i see nothing. his eyes are deadly serious.

I let go of Adds jacket collar. I step back. staring around me, _No,no that can't be. Who would fall for me? This is insane, but Add is insane. That must be it! He only loves me because of my dark power. The power that kills, The power that annihilates.  
_

I gaze at the corpses around me.

I stained the ground with knights blood. I feel numb with horror. This is what he loves? _  
_

 _My power did this  
I killed them….  
I killed them again  
Oh god  
Oh god  
Oh my god  
What have i done  
_

I feel like everything I touch will be destroyed. I slouch over but still stand as sobs rack my body, hands shaking uncontrollably, throat burning, eyes stinging, blood flowing, body dying. My mind is breaking.

I turn away from Add and walk blindly away, eyes glazed. I reach down and pick up my claymore. I spin around to face Add again, pointing my scarlet claymore at him.

I will seal his fate with red.

There's hate and pain running thru my veins as I accumulate all the blood and Dark El as possible into my blade. The claymore glows gold as a brutal cutting edge is formed. I force more Dark El into the attack, It swirls around me. My claymore is red-hot with power I feel my hands start to burn, but I hold the sword even tighter.  
I fouse the Dark El and blood, it pulls Add toward me with its power. He's only a few feet away.

I grit my teeth hard.

Then fill my lungs with oxygen and cry out the name of my final attack.

" _FATE SMASH_ "

With every bit of blood soaked strength I bring the vast blade across Adds chest. I feel the breaking of bones and a smile runs across my lips. Adds limp body falls to the ground face first. He lays there gasping for air, coughing.

I drop my claymore it falls to the broken stone road as my mouth fills full of hot blood. My hands are burnt bloody crimson from the power of my attack. I stagger for ward, head spinning I fall to my knees a few feet from the dying Add. I drag myself to him I grin down at his mutilated body practically cut in two. I heave him over and stare down into his bloody face.

I laugh at his demise.

The echos of my bloodlust filled laughter dance in the ruins of abandoned buildings.

"This is what you wanted right Add? This is what you love, no?"

I lean down and kiss his bloody still warm lips.

"This is the part of me that you love?"

Add smiles at me and softly laughs blood running from his mouth.

"No...my love...I adore all of you, insane or not insane….I have, and I always will, if you wish me to be dead i will not fight it."

My amber eyes fill with even more tears and dread.

"Damnit Add…" My voice cracking, full of regret. "What have I done to you? To everyone? Oh my god…" My tears fall to his blood covered face washing the red away drop by drop.

"I don't deserve your love. I don't deserve to be happy.I don't deserve to be sane….I deserve every bit of this bloodlust insanity…"

My fingers itch to keep killing. My hands meet Adds neck again but this time they don't hesitate. he's bright purple eyes stare at me as the light fades from them. I feel his neck break, His head falls back, mouth falling slightly open as the last bit of blood leaks from his throat. I bend down and press my blood covered lips to his, one last time.

I straighten up giggling with blood lust that turns to insane laughter again filling the air. I love this so much. this power,so much power, the blood, the killing. but I loath it all at the same time.

There's blood on my hands.  
and there will always be

Blood on my hands.

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 **The End**

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 **That's the end of this story, please review 3**


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